Monday, September 19, 2011

whatup dudes

hello large audience, hello! bet you didn't miss me.

in the last month i experienced an earthquake, the tail end of a hurricane, a three michelin-starred restaurant, and a raspberry lime rickey. no points will be given for guessing in which corner of which continent these events occurred. here are some other observations, some of them may be cynical, surprise surprise:

- now i understand why starbucks had to close so many locations in australia, because any single starbucks in america could do the same amount of business as the sum total of new south wales' franchises. lines out the door, all day every day. my number one conclusion is that american coffee must suck.

- there are people who drink dark carbonated beverages for breakfast

- bananas are literally 10 times more expensive at home

- same goes for lobsters

- washington dc does not believe in convenience after 5pm and on weekends

- if one were to enquire of the supervisor why the discount on iced tea does not show up on the self-checkout, the supervisor then explains that a membership card is needed by asking if one has one, but one does not, but the supervisor appears not to have heard the answer, and while one stands by preparing to pay the full price, the supervisor swipes her override card without even caring and thereby gives undeserving customers a huge discount

- no wonder the economy has the shits

- slim jims are officially the worst thing i put in my mouth during the entire time i was there, it was like string and spicy cholesterol in a cellophane tube, disgusting. inedible.

- all possible condiments are in original glass bottles

- butter is almost always whipped when served with complimentary bread - i highly recommend! easily spread and less highly consumed

- there is such a thing as a grilled cheese truck with a massive queue at all times

- baseball is awesome, i am a convert

- not only is baseball awesome, but for the first time ever i have a baseball cap which fits my large head

- ventilation in hotel bathrooms has apparently never been heard of, except in canada

- i 100% seriously think that sydney has the highest smokers per capita of any major city walking along its streets, i almost want to prove that this is true


now the part i know everyone has come to love and expect, book and movie reviews! hohoho
and the 100th book review is..

drumroll

c. trash, dorothy allison
i got this in the used section at the harvard book store, which had the best graphic novel section of any used book store i have ever been in. it was pretty good. i have a hard time distinguishing between the author and her first-person personas.

ci. granta 86: film
granta like all magazines is a little hit and miss, this one was only just ok.

lxvii. xmen: first class
not bad, considering. james mcavoy was so earnest.

lxviii. win win
a nice little movie. paul giamatti played paul giamatti.